Obviously due to my route to motherhood, I am going to be a working mom and I am totally okay with that. Even if the circumstances had been different and I had been married, I still think I would have gone back to work. The thought of someone else being responsible for my survival is not something I'm very fond of.
Originally I planned on getting a nanny, but the prices they charge are almost equal to a regular full-time job. And I do get it; it is a full-time job. However, it is one you can go to in your pajamas, do your own thing when the kid is sleeping, watch movies, talk on the phone, eat, etc. I guess for that reason I hadn't expected the cost to be as unruly as I see it. The only nannies who are in my price range are about 19 years old and look like they are headed to the club. Not. Gonna. Happen.
So, unless some miracle happens between now and mid-August, I will have to put Peanut in daycare.
I hate daycare. Even before I worked in several, I have always hated them. After working at one, my fears were confirmed and I now hate them even more. The child/teacher ratio is ridiculous. No one person can give adequate attention to 6 infants without something or someONE falling by the wayside. I know some parents will argue and say that it's good for the children to be with other children and at an older age, I totally agree. But in infancy I totally disagree. A child that young doesn't need to socialize with their peers. They need to be cared for by adults. They need face time/bonding time and lots of it. The thought of my child just lying in a crib the majority of the day or on the floor on a blanket is very unsettling. And I don't care WHAT the teachers tell you, that's what happens. I know, I lived it.
But, I knew going in that this was a possibility. I just keep reminding myself that it's not forever. Once she hits the age of really learning and grasping things I will find another alternative. I will NOT have a daycare teach my child. I know for a fact they have the young children watch movies that I do not approve of and if you read my previous post, you know that I don't approve of young children watching anything really. It's a group parenting mentality and I will not allow my daughter to experience it. If I have to sell my car and buy a clunker or do away with my iPhone to afford personalized care, so be it. What she experiences in her early years will shape a lot of her world in the years to come and I've made a commitment to ensuring that those experiences are what I choose for them to be and not what someone else thinks they should be.