Almost Halfway.

One more week to go and I'll be halfway there!  I can't believe it. It's gone by so fast and yet so slow. I have my confirmation appointment in a couple of weeks.  Funny thing; I hope and pray it's a girl now! Ha! I never thought I would say that but I actually hope it is a girl. I guess because I've had time to bond with her, so to speak. I spent much of the weekend arranging things in the apartment, making sure I have room for all of her stuff. Also did some shopping. Couldn't help myself. Here are a few of my favorite finds.

The last outfit, has to be my favorite. It will be her 4th of July outfit. So stinking cute!

She's had several additions from family members as well. Already her side of the closet is starting to fill up. I suspect the years to come will hold many a shopping spree for the two of us. Like mother, like daughter.

Mommy Dearest.

During the course of this pregnancy I've had several people comment about that fact that I will be a single mom. Not in a negative way, but just in a matter-of-fact way. And it's true, I will be. I'm also, by definition, a choice mom. And while I'm incredibly proud of that fact, it's something that I plan to remain mum about after my daughter is born. Maybe not to everyone, but for sure on public forums and in general conversation.

Why?

Well, honestly I am sick and tired of the single mother stigma. It's one that is given not only by others, but by single mothers themselves. While I understand (and will to an even greater degree once my daughter is born) that it's hard to be a single, working mother, I don't believe the job of  being a "mom" itself is EVER easy; single or not.  Yes, logistically those with mates may have it a bit "easier" when it comes to those type of things; taking the child here and there, watching the baby while the mom takes a bath, helping with household chores etc. But I'm sick of this belief that your marital status defines what it's like to be a mother for you. People automatically assume you have less money, you're beyond exhausted all the time and have no time to take care of yourself. And as I said, it's not just outsiders that draw these conclusions, but it's single mothers that push this mindset as well. I can't tell you how many times I've heard the words "Well, it's not easy being a single mother." Over and over. Every time I've wanted to answer, "Oh and it's easy to be a mom when you have a mate?"  Being a mom is tough. Taking the responsibility of someone else's life into your hands is never an easy task no matter what your marital status or gender for that matter. But parents do it day in and day out.

The same goes for choice moms as well. While it's a very noble thing that these women have done, I get sick of hearing about it over and over. "I chose to have a baby on my own." I'm not saying that I don't think it should EVER be discussed, but eventually, just be a mom. Why is it so vital to you that everyone know you made the choice to do it on your own? Is it a fear of people thinking you were reckless and just ended up pregnant? I assume that's a possibility and while I get that concept (cause I've had those thoughts too), I refuse to be defined by a title like that. While I get that it's a story to tell and a journey, my story and journey is going to be told in written form, not public displays. This isn't about ME, it's about my precious child.

I think a great example of this, is adoptive mothers. I've never ONCE heard an adoptive mother (single or otherwise) run around saying,  "I'm an adoptive mom!" They just love their babies and are so glad they have them; explanation of their motherhood status not needed.

So while I may post about being a choice mom and the steps that I've taken for now, as soon as my daughter is born I will no longer present myself as a choice mom or a single mom for that matter. Because at the end of the day, a mom is a mom is a mom. And that's exactly how I want to be recognized; just "mom."

I am WOMAN! (but who cares??!!)

Sexism, feminism, whatever you want to call it, I'm OVER it. Seriously.

In the past week I have read two articles addressing supposedly "sexist" behavior.

The first article was about two top chefs joining a plea to Hasbro for a "gender-neutral" Easy-Bake Oven. Apparently a girl went to buy one for her brother (who is four) and was bothered by the fact that they only came in purple and pink.

The second article was regarding an Ohio college that refused to put up "MEN WORKING" signs on a construction site because they were "discriminatory" against women.

BOTH articles have left me completely outraged and over the battle of the sexes that America seems to be trapped in.

First of all, since when are pink and purple "girl only" colors? And what harm could possibly come from a 4 year old using an Easy-Bake Oven that was pink and purple?? It's the same stupid concept that drove Lego to produce pink Lego sets  because apparently the others were too boy driven and girls were getting upset. Or shall we say their over-bearing, over-aggressive, "I have to feel equal otherwise I feel bad about myself," mothers were. When it comes to the ovens, this is how I see this stupidity playing out:

Annoyed Women: "WHAT? You're saying that only WOMEN belong in the kitchen? This isn't the 1950's! Women work now, you know! They're not slaves to men and housework anymore!"

Annoyed Men: "Only women can cook!?? That's outrageous. Men cook just as much as women these days. And why should we be subjected to girly colors? We're manly men!"

Me: "SHUT THE HECK UP AND GET OVER IT! It's a toy for crying out loud! Yes, women work. No, it's not the 1950's. Yay for you, you feel semi-equal. (Which to me is totally a personal ego issue. Equality has very little to do with rights anymore and everything to do with your own view of yourself.) Yes, men cook. Yay for you, you finally can cook that meal your girlfriend always wanted. Yes, you're manly. If you're that manly you should be able to handle a pink oven, if  you're not manly, you should like the pink oven!!

Okay, on to the second article. Has anyone ever seen a woman work a construction site? I haven't. And if a woman DOES work at a construction site, that sign should make her happy. She got her wish. She's now seen as equal to a man.

Yes, I'm fired up today. I am over people being offended in this country. I'm over trying to make everything a power struggle. There are so many important things in life that get pushed aside so we can spend time complaining about this crap. Get over it. Grow up. Be proud of who you are and what you do and if no one acknowledges it, welcome to the real world. You be proud of you. That's really all that matters.